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How much sex is actually normal?

Sex in the relationship How much is pleasure "normal"?

Excitingly, even today many people still have problems talking openly about sex.

Every now and then they still ask themselves the question: "Am I having too much or too little sex?"

According to classic prejudices, those who have too little sex are frigid, those who have too much sex are considered nymphomaniacs. But is there actually a certain amount of sex that is considered "normal"? Interest in an answer to this consideration definitely seems to be there. Because: statistically speaking, the question is frequently googled. In order to find the corresponding answers, studies that have been compiled over decades are often consulted.

First of all: If you are in a relationship and are happy with your sex life, you should not go by any statistics. However, if the relationship is suffering, it is time to do some research and (especially) talk to your partner.

The following sections are intended to shed light on what is considered "normal" or "average" in terms of a fulfilling sex life.

The first months

In the first months of a relationship, everything is still new and exciting. Sex is particularly tingling because the other person's preferences only gradually come to light. come and the butterflies in the stomach increase the desire even more.

Many couples have sex every day during this time - sometimes several times. But even those who don't have sex every day during the first 18 to 24 months of a relationship can of course have a healthy partnership.

By the way, the first phase of a romance is called "limerence" by scientists and can be translated as "intense infatuation". And this is exactly what often shows in bed.

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In an established relationship

Many couples are happy when the relationship becomes more intense and lasts longer than just a few months. After the so-called "limerence", the lust usually reduces. But this says nothing about how much the two people love each other.

Many couples do not have as much sex now as they did in the beginning. If one partner feels disadvantaged, the problem should definitely be discussed - perhaps also with a couple therapist. If both are satisfied, however, there is no reason to go by naked statistics.

People who are in a long-term relationship without a child usually have sex once a week or six times a month. Of course, there are always outliers upwards or downwards.

When, husband and wife become mum and dad

Many parents will agree that sex life changes greatly after the birth or adoption of a child. The offspring receives full attention and the parents relinquish their needs.

But lust should not be neglected either - after the initial excitement everything goes back to normal. Studies have shown that the more openly the partners talk about the problem, the more often a regular sex life is restored. Many couples manage to arrange to have sex once a week (with a little planning).

Sex as an addiction

What sounds contrived to some can become a real problem for others. The constant urge to have sex at any time and any place is often pure torture for those affected. Sex addiction is a serious psychological problem and interferes with everyday life.

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In total, more than half a million people are said to suffer from this disease. The number of unreported cases is probably considerably higher. Since many people make fun of this problem, it is often difficult for those affected to speak openly about their situation.





Hugo 17. May 2021 um 15:27

I think it makes absolutely no difference what society thinks. If someone I know finds out about my inclinations and says something negative, I wouldn't care. I could give ten reasons myself why I don't like it. If they are stupid enough not to understand and accept me, then that's their problem. Apart from that, I don't stick my sexual side out and connect it to everyday life: what happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom.


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